10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• There's only one concept to understand in poker: at the end walk out with more money than you walked in with.
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• Fook the floosh droo!
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• If you can't spot the sucker at the table, guess what..
• "No river, no fish."
• Poker is like sex - everyone thinks that they are the best at it but few actually know what they are doing - Layne Flack
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.