10 Random Poker Quotes

• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• Poker is like sex - everyone thinks that they are the best at it but few actually know what they are doing - Layne Flack
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-
• "If you want to know what lies on the road ahead, ask the man whos on the way back" anon
• Poker is for fat, American losers.
• People who play poker often wear raw hide.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• After taking a beat: "How bad do they play?...This is the World Series of Poker!" -Phil Hellmuth Jr.
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers