10 Random Poker Quotes

• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• For all you probability freaks, remember to consider the probability that an opponent is lying. Generally, liars dig holes and keep on lying, at least in the short run, as they try to climb out. Adjust your math prowess accordingly. Tells are paramount, as much or more as your calculating brain is. Poker becomes super-multi-variable when the psychological realm is joined with that already beautiful world of card probabilities. -- a mathematician
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• "What've you got, Layne?" "You BEAT." Final table banter between Layne Flack and Mike "The Mouth" Matusow. $ 6,000 No Limit Hold'em Final Day 2004 Ultimatebet.com Poker Classic Radisson Aruba Resort & Casino, Palm Beach
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• "Poker is just like the fucking universe man, the different combinations and outs are infinite so it's pointless racking your mind about bad beats and shit" Stephen Morris
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from