10 Random Poker Quotes

• I don't want to be called a good loser. A good loser is still a loser. -Stu Unger
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• The greatest feeling is when you've broken your opponent's spirit & crushed his confidence. The fact that you've taken both his bankroll & the shirt off his back is just a bonus. Tom V. (Livonia, Michigan)
• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.