10 Random Poker Quotes

• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• what is a river if there is no river to draw to water
• "No river, no fish."
• "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em." Johnnie Moss
• Famous last words before he became a eunuch 'Id bet my bollocks on this hand'
• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• "I could make a crazy call on you..." Sammy Farhah to Chris Moneymaker at the final table when Moneymaker went all in.
• Sometimes nothing's a pretty cool hand -paul newman-