10 Random Poker Quotes

• You have to piss with the dick you have
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• See AA before the flop is like a smile from the girl of your dreams, see AA lose to a pour hand on the river feels like the same chick just gave you a bad case of blue balls
• "Take my advice and do as you please" - TJ Cloutier
• "See, in my world - the world of high-stakes gin and poker - we play for cold, hard cash. It's all business, pure and simple. Anyone who thinks cardplaying is a 'game' - I'll show you a loser. Money... M-O-N-E-Y. That's how you measure success. One dollar at a time. One chip at a time. That's how you keep score." Stu Unger
• "It's hard work. Gambling. Playing poker. Don't let anyone tell you different. Think about what it's like sitting at a poker table with people whose only goal is to cut your throat, take your money, and leave you out back talking to yourself about what went wrong inside. That probably sounds harsh. But that's the way it is at the poker table. If you don't believe me, then you're the lamb that's going off to the slaughter." Stu Unger, three-time WSOP Champion
• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• "Hold em is to stud what chess is to checkers." -- Johnny Moss
• Sign hanging in old time saloon: Liquor in the front, poker in the rear. -The old sage.