10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you raise with 72 offsuit, you get to raise when the flops is 7-7-2, ... once in your life. If you fold 72 offsuit, you get the free time to study your opponents or the waitresses and avoid polishing the rail with your sweater ... tough decision!
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• After taking a beat: "How bad do they play?...This is the World Series of Poker!" -Phil Hellmuth Jr.
• "I already messed this hand up pretty good, so I may as well call." Chris Ferguson
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!