10 Random Poker Quotes

• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Sometimes nothing's a pretty cool hand -paul newman-
• If you could lose all of your money again... what would you have done differently?
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer
• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus