10 Random Poker Quotes

• You have to piss with the dick you have
• Fold and live to fold again
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "All-in, bitches!!!"
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• Welcome to kicker school
• If there was no luck involved I'd win every time. - Phil Hellmuth