10 Random Poker Quotes

• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• The next best thing to playing and winning is playing and losing. --Nick the Greek
• You know that you've seen a lot of poker when three people are all in before the flop, two of them turn over aces and the other turns over kings, and the king hits on the river, and you say, "I've seen that before, and ...."
• This above all else: To thine own self be true. - William Shakespeare