10 Random Poker Quotes

• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• when you win its got to make a difference when you lose its got to hurt.
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• "Why do you think the same five guys make it to the final table of the World Series of Poker EVERY YEAR? What, are they the luckiest guys in Las Vegas?" - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• The best thing about that hand was I wasn't in it
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.