10 Random Poker Quotes

• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• Liquor in the front, Poker in the rear.
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• Luck is when preparation meets opportunity. - unknown
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• "Never go broke in an unraised pot" -T.J. Cloutier
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• "I'd rather be lucky than good" - Lefty Gomez