10 Random Poker Quotes

• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• "I guess there's nothing left but all in." -Greg Raymer
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• After taking a beat: "How bad do they play?...This is the World Series of Poker!" -Phil Hellmuth Jr.
• The best feeling in the world if flopping the nut straight against two players acting before you who both flopped sets. I'll take my chances against 5 outs.
• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.
• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'