10 Random Poker Quotes

• Famous last words before he became a eunuch 'Id bet my bollocks on this hand'
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• I used to go out, go dancing, and talk to the chicks. Now, my life has been down-sized to the couch, the laptop, and the occasional cranberry and rum. --The 5 card stud---
• The only thing you lose by folding is the opportunity to win.
• There's only one concept to understand in poker: at the end walk out with more money than you walked in with.
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• Overhead at a ring game during a tournament when people where discussing there bad beat knock outs etc "Ya I got knocked out of both tournies the same way....I got caught Bluffing"