10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Why not, when some because there are three.
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• The best thing about that hand was I wasn't in it
• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
• You can't let it get you down when somebody knocks you out of a tournament playing a hand they shouldn't have played. Without these types of players, nobody would win any amount of money, so sometimes you just have to take your medicine. - T.J. Cloutier, Championship Omaha
• See AA before the flop is like a smile from the girl of your dreams, see AA lose to a pour hand on the river feels like the same chick just gave you a bad case of blue balls
• There's only one concept to understand in poker: at the end walk out with more money than you walked in with.
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• "I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)