10 Random Poker Quotes

• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• The all-in play works everytime but once.
• Life is a gamble at terrible odds if it was a bet you would never take it
• Nobody knows where the hobo goes when it snows.
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.
• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet
• A great poker player knows when he is playing poorly.