10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Famous last words before he became a eunuch 'Id bet my bollocks on this hand'
• Ive always like the quote, "Who needs balls when you got the nuts!!!"
• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
• Concentrate. Don't do anything stupid. Catch some cards. ----Mrs. Cloutier, as TJ heads out to another tournament
• "What've you got, Layne?" "You BEAT." Final table banter between Layne Flack and Mike "The Mouth" Matusow. $ 6,000 No Limit Hold'em Final Day 2004 Ultimatebet.com Poker Classic Radisson Aruba Resort & Casino, Palm Beach
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.