10 Random Poker Quotes

• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• Liquor in the front, Poker in the rear.
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• Famous last words before he became a eunuch 'Id bet my bollocks on this hand'
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• Some people ask "what could they possibly call me with" before making a bet. I don't ask that question. I just make the bet and let them supply the answer. - Action Bob
• Nobody knows where the hobo goes when it snows.