10 Random Poker Quotes

• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• This above all else: To thine own self be true. - William Shakespeare
• never rub another mans rhubarb, unless he has the nuts - Jack Nicholson
• Poker is a lot like sex. Everyone thinks they know what they are doing, but only a few are actually good at it.- "Dutch" Boyd
• when you win its got to make a difference when you lose its got to hurt.
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• The all-in play works everytime but once.
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."