10 Random Poker Quotes

• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• A great poker player knows when he is playing poorly.
• If luck wasn't a factor, I'd win every one. -Phil Hellmuth
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• "Oh give me a break, Ace-eight! I guess some people like getting their money in as a 3-to-1 underdog." -Phil Hellmuth, at the 2004 WSOP
• Normally, I wouldn't have called you, but you've been running bad!
• The only way to win is to play. Unfortunetly, it is also the only way to loose.