10 Random Poker Quotes

• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• I suck, therefore I suck out. North Shore Mike
• Why not, when some because there are three.
• ''when i bet i either have nuts or balls.''FRAN PINCHOT
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "Why do you think the same five guys make it to the final table of the World Series of Poker EVERY YEAR? What, are they the luckiest guys in Las Vegas?" - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• "I'm broke one day and have a fortune the next day, and I don't give a damn" --Jack "Treetop" Straus--