10 Random Poker Quotes

• this hand sucked me in like an eagle in a jet engine
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• im going to 2 out you to death
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• To win a bit of money, make your opponent think your hand is stronger than it is. To win a lot of money, make him think your hand is weaker than it is. - Josh Avery