10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is for fat, American losers.
• Deal 'em, and read 'em. Ralph Malph
• For all you probability freaks, remember to consider the probability that an opponent is lying. Generally, liars dig holes and keep on lying, at least in the short run, as they try to climb out. Adjust your math prowess accordingly. Tells are paramount, as much or more as your calculating brain is. Poker becomes super-multi-variable when the psychological realm is joined with that already beautiful world of card probabilities. -- a mathematician
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• Normally, I wouldn't have called you, but you've been running bad!
• Its better to have played and lost then to not have played at all Dick McWatters
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• You should pay as much as possible for a free card.
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."