10 Random Poker Quotes

• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-
• The only way to win is to play. Unfortunetly, it is also the only way to loose.
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• some call cheating immoral, but then again, it's immoral to let a sucker keep his money.
• If there was no luck involved I'd win every time. - Phil Hellmuth
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.