10 Random Poker Quotes

• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• "If i dont make that final table, nobody's gonna remember me next year. If i do make that final table, Im a poker legend overnight" - Dutch Boyd 2003 WSOP Main Event
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Fook the floosh droo!
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts