10 Random Poker Quotes

• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• you cannot have everything....where would you put it. (steven wright)
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• if u play for the thrill u are ill
• A pair of Aces with a low kicker is like a chick without nipples... -doyle brunson, circa 1986
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.