10 Random Poker Quotes

• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• I don't want to be called a good loser. A good loser is still a loser. -Stu Unger
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• If you raise with 72 offsuit, you get to raise when the flops is 7-7-2, ... once in your life. If you fold 72 offsuit, you get the free time to study your opponents or the waitresses and avoid polishing the rail with your sweater ... tough decision!
• There is less luck involved than a bad player thinks there is, and there more luck involved than a good player will admit there is