10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is a lot like sex. Everyone thinks they know what they are doing, but only a few are actually good at it.- "Dutch" Boyd
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• You can't let it get you down when somebody knocks you out of a tournament playing a hand they shouldn't have played. Without these types of players, nobody would win any amount of money, so sometimes you just have to take your medicine. - T.J. Cloutier, Championship Omaha
• Liquor up front, poker in the rear
• You can't lead a horse to water, but a Donkey will follow you all the way to the River.
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• Never educate a stupid poker player.
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• In order to live, you must be willing to die - Amir Vahedi