10 Random Poker Quotes

• Overhead at a ring game during a tournament when people where discussing there bad beat knock outs etc "Ya I got knocked out of both tournies the same way....I got caught Bluffing"
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• The next best thing to playing and winning is playing and losing. --Nick the Greek
• the perfect poker player deploys his masterful execution of logic and then litters it with chaotic sequences of lunacy.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• If you raise with 72 offsuit, you get to raise when the flops is 7-7-2, ... once in your life. If you fold 72 offsuit, you get the free time to study your opponents or the waitresses and avoid polishing the rail with your sweater ... tough decision!
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• You can't lead a horse to water, but a Donkey will follow you all the way to the River.