10 Random Poker Quotes

• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• Remember these three simple words and you'll never go broke........ "Stick em Up!"
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• "Percentage players die broke too, Burt." -Fast Eddie Felson "The Hustler"
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.