10 Random Poker Quotes

• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus
• Life is a gamble at terrible odds if it was a bet you would never take it
• Remember these three simple words and you'll never go broke........ "Stick em Up!"
• "In low limit hold em' deception plays a less significant role. Either someone is already looking at that hand or will call out of curiousity." ---Lee Jones
• "I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• "If you want to know what lies on the road ahead, ask the man whos on the way back" anon
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!