10 Random Poker Quotes

• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet
• "You will show your poker greatness by the hands you fold, not the hands you play." -Dan Reed
• "No river, no fish."
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• "If you want to know what lies on the road ahead, ask the man whos on the way back" anon
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Life is a gamble at terrible odds if it was a bet you would never take it
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.