10 Random Poker Quotes

• "What's the sound of shuffling a single card?" - tidytom
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• When you're drawing dead, you always get there.
• Some days you're the pigeon, some days you're the statue.
• Fold and live to fold again
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em." Johnnie Moss
• Any two cards can lose... and they usually do.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.