10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Poker is 100% skill, 50% luck" - Phil Hellmuth
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• "No river, no fish."
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• when i folded an A-7 suited under the gun which would've ended up giving me the small end of a mini jackpot, my dad said, "yeah, if i would've driven to Tucson, I would've found that diamond ring. But i don't drive to Tucson."
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from