10 Random Poker Quotes

• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• I'm a better poker player than I am a player. -RedGrant
• "I better straighten out my game, before I flush all my money down the toilet" - D. Drury
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• Take me to the river. Wash me in the water.
• "Poker is just like the fucking universe man, the different combinations and outs are infinite so it's pointless racking your mind about bad beats and shit" Stephen Morris
• A pair of Aces with a low kicker is like a chick without nipples... -doyle brunson, circa 1986
• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson