10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• There's only one concept to understand in poker: at the end walk out with more money than you walked in with.
• The worst hand to have is the second best hand.
• If you play 69, always bet on the come.
• Poker players and police officers have alot in common. Hours and hours of boredom with a few moments of sheer terror.
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.
• You should pay as much as possible for a free card.
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• I have two small pair.....8's and 8's.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"