10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Concentrate. Don't do anything stupid. Catch some cards. ----Mrs. Cloutier, as TJ heads out to another tournament
• "All-in, bitches!!!"
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• Famous last words before he became a eunuch 'Id bet my bollocks on this hand'
• "See, in my world - the world of high-stakes gin and poker - we play for cold, hard cash. It's all business, pure and simple. Anyone who thinks cardplaying is a 'game' - I'll show you a loser. Money... M-O-N-E-Y. That's how you measure success. One dollar at a time. One chip at a time. That's how you keep score." Stu Unger
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Take me to the river. Wash me in the water.
• Normally, I wouldn't have called you, but you've been running bad!