10 Random Poker Quotes

• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• I'm enough of a dreamer to realize it might have been that elusive something a gambler calls luck. But, I'm also enough of a realist to know that in general we make our own luck - through knowledge, skill and experience.- Doyle Brunson
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• You can't lead a horse to water, but a Donkey will follow you all the way to the River.