10 Random Poker Quotes

• it is true that you may fool all of the people some of the time: you can even fool some of the people all the time: but you can't fool al of the peole all the time. -Abraham Lincoln
• "I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• I don't want to be called a good loser. A good loser is still a loser. -Stu Unger
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• Don't challenge strong players, challange weak ones. That's what they're there for. - John Vorhaus, author of Killer Poker
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.