10 Random Poker Quotes

• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• "Poker is just like the fucking universe man, the different combinations and outs are infinite so it's pointless racking your mind about bad beats and shit" Stephen Morris
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• "Never say 'Whoa' to a mud puddle" -- Anonymous $4-to-go NL A-5 Lowball Table, Cameo Club Palo Alto CA, 1977
• There is less luck involved than a bad player thinks there is, and there more luck involved than a good player will admit there is
• If there was no luck involved I'd win every time. - Phil Hellmuth
• Normally, I wouldn't have called you, but you've been running bad!