10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• Take me to the river. Wash me in the water.
• You have to piss with the dick you have
• "Hold em is to stud what chess is to checkers." -- Johnny Moss
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• if u play for the thrill u are ill
• "I already messed this hand up pretty good, so I may as well call." Chris Ferguson
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)