10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is a lot like sex. Everyone thinks they know what they are doing, but only a few are actually good at it.- "Dutch" Boyd
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• A pair of Aces with a low kicker is like a chick without nipples... -doyle brunson, circa 1986
• I suck, therefore I suck out. North Shore Mike
• "Give me running 10's boy!!" Mike Laing - after CALLING 78K with 10-8 on a board of K22
• "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em." Johnnie Moss
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• in the poker game of life women are the rake
• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."