10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you can't quit the best hand, you can't play.
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• When you're drawing dead, you always get there.
• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet
• You should pay as much as possible for a free card.
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• This above all else: To thine own self be true. - William Shakespeare