10 Random Poker Quotes

• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• You can't lead a horse to water, but a Donkey will follow you all the way to the River.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "All-in, bitches!!!"
• Poker is like life, most people don't learn from their mistakes they only recognize them. C.Arel
• Fook the floosh droo!
• This above all else: To thine own self be true. - William Shakespeare
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks