10 Random Poker Quotes

• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• "No river, no fish."
• Asked why he played in a game known to be crooked, a player replied, "But it's the only game in town."
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• Poker players and police officers have alot in common. Hours and hours of boredom with a few moments of sheer terror.
• what is a river if there is no river to draw to water
• "Not all trappers wear 'coon-skin hats."