10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• "Hold em is to stud what chess is to checkers." -- Johnny Moss
• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer
• "All-in, bitches!!!"
• Nixon financed his first political campaign with money he won playing poker against his fellow naval officers.
• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• The next best thing to playing poker and winning, is playing poker and losing.