10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• Deal 'em, and read 'em. Ralph Malph
• It's Free To Fold...
• You know that you've seen a lot of poker when three people are all in before the flop, two of them turn over aces and the other turns over kings, and the king hits on the river, and you say, "I've seen that before, and ...."
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• The next best thing to playing poker and winning, is playing poker and losing.
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• "I guess the sayings' true. In the poker game of life, women are the rake man. They are the f---kin' rake." - Worm (Rounders, 1998)