10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• "Just play every hand, you can't miss them all." -Sammy Farha's reply to, "How does he do it?"
• Poker - love the pain or play checkers. - MoeSyzslak
• "If i dont make that final table, nobody's gonna remember me next year. If i do make that final table, Im a poker legend overnight" - Dutch Boyd 2003 WSOP Main Event
• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz
• Famous last words before he became a eunuch 'Id bet my bollocks on this hand'
• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow