10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• Sucking out won't help you. The only cure for stupidity is losing. -- The BRICK --
• "I guess if there weren't luck involved, I'd win every time." -Phil Hellmuth
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• I used to go out, go dancing, and talk to the chicks. Now, my life has been down-sized to the couch, the laptop, and the occasional cranberry and rum. --The 5 card stud---
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."