10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.
• Deal 'em, and read 'em. Ralph Malph
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• This above all else: To thine own self be true. - William Shakespeare
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.